Wednesday, July 23, 2008

the mood is.

i've been having some strange feelings recently when it comes to love. limitations i guess. i've always heard that you should love the one you can't live without...do i want that though? do i want to be so enamored with someone that i can't live without them, my life stops when they leave or that i stay in a situation that is not good for me? no, no i can't do that...not again. so then am i loving as i should? am i giving wholeheartedly, am i being true to love but then wanting to be love unconditionally when i know i might be holding back?

i always used to say circumstances made me what i am meaning that i am how i am because of my life events but then i get on my couch and counsel people in letting go the weights from the past. i feel within myself that i can handle any heartbreak that may come my way because i got over my first real love but i could just be blowing smoke as well. it's one of those situations that you won't know until you know i guess.

but i know i am lacking something but i just can't figure out if it is a lacking that i am the cause of or if this is the reason. i want to care about something so passionately that just thinking about it gives me goose bumps but i am afraid that some circumstances have left me empty and numb...and i hate it. i hate not feeling.

slow beats to quick steps
warms winds to cool your chest
sunset moans to sundown moans to sunset
reggae to old dub to ragga soca to bashment
whether with friends acquaintances family
sorrow sighs to laughter to Love's memory
wherever there is wind to run with the music
the mood is however you make it
so..make it...

thank you.

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