i'm in NY cause i lost my job, i'm in NY cause my grandfather is worsening, i'm in NY cause somehow i feel this is where God wants me to be right now so i'm not afraid.
my second home. being here reminds me of all the reasons why i love this city. why i appreciate the seasons of change.
1:03 and i can't sleep because there is something nagging at me about the way i was "let go" though i know i should let go and Let God.
see, if it weren't for me losing my job i would not be in the position i am right now. i would not be in the position to lend support to my grandmother who really needs it the most right now. as we prepare for the transition into the "home".
i was blaming 'this body' and 'that body' for me being unemployed. thinking 'they'd won'. but right now i don't see any winners. and if it was in God's hands from the beginning i really don't have a need to be worried or fearful.
i'm awake at 1:06 am because i know it takes my grand dad a few tossings and turnings to fall soundly to sleep. i'm awake because i need to be. i'm awake so i could be there in case he needs me. either way, i don't mind.